John Cleese on Twitter RSS

http://twitter.com/JohnCleese

The legendary John Cleeseis an Academy Award-nominated English actor, comedian, writer, film producer and singer, who is known as being a member of Monty Python and his appearances in major films.

• JohnCleese: @CycleFreak Yes, but couching it in those terms made me instantly understandable, and down wiv da kids innit

  08:26:16 pm on September 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Which font are you most scared of?

  07:58:19 pm on September 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: ... I will toast you all with a hot chocolate (made with soya, as I'm allergic to everything else)...

  10:21:28 pm on September 2, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Oh, by the way - you are all to be congratulated... The vote for the NSPCC helped them win a donation from Twitter!!!

  10:21:01 pm on September 2, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: I hear that lazy hanger-on has claimed glory about the jigsaw... Well, he'll tweet again, once his fingers are healed..

  10:18:22 pm on September 2, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: RT .@tenindenmark: @JohnCleese Just received one of your lovely t-shirts today. Lovely! (Thank you!)

  02:04:35 pm on August 31, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Just hold quite still and don't worry about the ladder

  12:19:19 pm on August 29, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @Lozzykinz sadist

  12:32:07 am on August 28, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Result! http://audioboo.fm/boos/57635

  06:54:12 pm on August 23, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Well done the England cricket team!

  06:49:32 pm on August 23, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Only 2 hours left for this Nigerian Lottery Special :) http://bit.ly/cleesebot - JC Minion Bot

  03:58:14 pm on August 20, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @hikke_en_tein @predemption exactly. only for the paranoid and/or collectors of paranoid items

  10:35:07 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @bbmumblings broke, vulnerable and gullible

  10:22:34 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @Corvus004 the Special Nigerian Lottery Reduced Circumstances Women's Organic T-Shirt costs a lot less http://bit.ly/cleeseytee

  10:16:32 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @Corvus004 it's for really paranoid people

  10:09:54 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @LionheartIns the link is http://bit.ly/antihypnosis but don't retweet it

  09:55:49 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @Katieshelll then you're just not paranoid enough for this shirt

  09:50:53 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: It's for really paranoid people http://bit.ly/antihypnosis

  09:47:11 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @Bamlett no it's 193.66 US

  09:46:18 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @mmiller0912 it is limited to people who can afford it ;-)

  09:44:17 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @ArsenalSarah not sure it's an insult to want funny people to be funny always. more an occupational hazard

  09:43:36 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: last JCNL for today - a limited edition anti-hypnosis shirt http://bit.ly/antihypnosis Sale Ends in 24 Hours

  09:39:25 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @CarriBugbee who on earth is funny all the time? surely this is an opportunity for different kinds of exchange

  08:41:33 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @Jhbongos quite a few places you can pick up free shirts. christians, political parties, rock groups all do that, so you should be ok

  08:35:52 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: my minions have designed - as requested - an organic girl's tshirt http://bit.ly/cleeseytee

  08:27:08 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: OK we've reduced a couple of shirts so I only make 1 cent on each sale.. afraid we can't go lower than spreadshirt's minimum price!

  07:36:14 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @trehvi i will apparently get the money. no idea how long i will keep it of course

  07:31:00 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @RojoNatural good idea

  07:19:20 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: NIGERIAN LOTTERY: Follow @JohnCleese in this top quality 100% cotton shirt and look both smart and trendy! http://bit.ly/cleesebot

  07:10:48 pm on August 19, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Sorry, who am I again?

  01:32:12 pm on August 18, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: RT @LloydWoolf: Do you think you could plug my sketch show? I promise it's good, and very few people watch it. COWARDS, tonight 9.30pm BBC4

  12:08:25 pm on August 18, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @gazzalon who are you again?

  12:06:48 pm on August 18, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: RT .@deekdeekster: http://bit.ly/tearjerk it's a moving tribute from Radiohead of Harry Patch.. ahh.. moving right along now

  06:22:59 pm on August 5, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: and in case that short Childline link isn't working for some of you here is another one! http://bit.ly/votem

  03:00:24 pm on August 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: here is that Childline link again: please vote for them! http://3.ly/Q9z

  02:57:42 pm on August 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: ... now, back to getting better, and wondering how Garry would look with one eyebrow shaved off...

  02:15:03 pm on August 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: ... they answer as many calls as they can on Childline, but 1/3 of calls go un-answered... Winning the Twesitval could help...

  02:14:29 pm on August 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: ... you to support something that means a lot to me... the NSPCC... Please vote for them and their great work on Childline at http://3.l ...

  02:12:14 pm on August 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: My dear, dear twittering twats. I have dragged myself from my bed, where I have been resting, and thinking of new ways to taunt Garry... ...

  02:11:19 pm on August 4, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: @HarryTucker It's possible to create better comedy in a laboratory these days?

  03:54:28 pm on July 25, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: My pro-state of the union address is this - every day, in every way, I'm getting better. Although, I think that Garry is drugging me...

  02:25:33 pm on July 25, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Dear long suffering fans, just to let you know that I am on the mend. Poking Garry with that fork cheered me up no end....

  04:12:00 pm on July 24, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: ... well actually, it wasn't a fork, it was a spoon, as that was all that I had to hand..

  04:10:16 pm on July 24, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Feeling a bit better. May be strong enough to poke Garry in the eye with a plastic fork, which is a sign that my strength is coming back...

  07:39:15 pm on July 23, 2009 |
   

• JohnCleese: Dearest Twittering Twats, Just to let you know that reports of my death are greatly exaggerated...

  02:47:08 pm on July 23, 2009 |
   

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